I know you pathetic armpit freaks will absolutely love what I so generously decided to provide you. You should feel extremely privileged that I'm so shamelessly showing off my godly pits for your viewing pleasure loser. Watch as I tease you into full submission. I laugh at you as you sit there and swoon over my perfect pits. I'll have you edging the entire time and laugh as I know you won't even be able to last the entire video. Ha! Soon you'll realize your only reason for existing is to worship me. Every inch of these pits will own your worthless life, and even more importantly- your wallet.